There are a few little habits that are must-haves for your manifestation toolkit. Start manifesting love into your life with these sweet and simple steps.

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Before entering the wonderful relationship I’m in now a few years ago, I spent a lot of years being single and not wanting to be. I tried a million and one ways to manifest love—some incredibly potent, and some not so much.

Here are some practices you might consider bumping to the top of the list if you’re looking to manifest a loving relationship in your life.

Meditate.

Or at least create space for some quiet time every day. There’s no more powerful way to connect with your inherent lovability, intuition and inner wisdom, which serve you oh-so-powerfully amidst all the dating chatter. Headspace is a fantastic app to get you started with meditation if you’re new.

Speak kindly to yourself.

If you don’t believe you deserve love, people around you can feel that, no matter how you try to fake it. Friendly self-talk is an incredibly powerful way to shift your vibration and mindset.

Live the life you want to live now.

No waiting until Mr. or Ms. Right shows up to focus on the things that light you up. The perfect people for you will be magnetized by the positive energy of you living a joyful life. Do your thing now.

Get clear on your top values (aka your top priorities) in your life.

They’ll serve as a North Star to guide you back to center when you get thrown off balance by the dating process.

Leave your house.

Online dating and Netflix are great and all, but you do at some point actually have to leave your front door to give those great love matches a chance to cross your path. The universe wants to meet you halfway, but you have to take that first step.

Clear out any old limiting stories you’re hanging onto about love, relationships, or your capacity to have them.

For years I believed I wasn’t capable of “doing relationships,” so—no surprise—I was perpetually single. Update your story to match the love and life you want to have in this next chapter.

Write down your vision of your ideal loving relationship and read it out loud every day. 

This one is so powerful. Be sure to include how you’re being and how you feel, not just making a list of your ideal partner’s attributes.

Write down every limiting belief you’re still clinging to about your capacity (or perceived lack thereof) to manifest the love you want.

Then scratch each out or burn a piece of paper with them on it, and upgrade each one to a belief that serves the love you want now. Read your new list of beliefs about how completely capable of giving and receiving love you are every day.

Spend time with inspiring couples.

Train your brain to understand that love is possible. Spend time with couples whose relationships you admire, and pull away from models that dampen your hopefulness.

Focus on yourself first.

You can spend all the time in the world dating online or hanging out at bars or meditation retreats looking for single people, but if you’re not good with yourself, love will always feel like an uphill struggle. The only way out is through.

Be present.

If you’re constantly fixating 20 years into the future about your love life, it’s impossible to see things for what they actually are in this moment.

Focus on your positive qualities.

Yes, you have areas for growth and need to do that inner work, but the more you focus on all the ways you’re already awesome, the more of that attractive energy you’ll put out into the world.

Practice forgiveness.

Whether you didn’t show up the way you would have liked on a date or your date didn’t, forgive yourself or them for any known or unknown harm caused and move on. Clinging and resenting block the flow of the love that wants to come to you.

Be open to love showing up in a different package than you’d imagined.

Sure, be clear on your deal breakers, but stay open to how the qualities you’re looking for might actually manifest.

Tap into your intuition.

Your intuition is your barometer of which matches are a good fit for you on a soul level. Tune in and trust your gut.

Ban complaints about being single.

Complaining blocks the flow of abundance. Be selective about what types of people you spend your time with as you’re manifesting the love you want, especially friends who constantly bemoan how there are no good girls or guys out there.

Mantra it up.

Come up with a few key phrases that feel resonant and uplifting about your capacity to receive love into your life to “rinse and repeat” with regularly. Mantras can truly unlock great things in our lives.

“I am fully capable of giving and receiving unconditional love now” is one example.

Ditch blame and judgment.

Every time you blame or judge a date for not being who you wanted them to be, you’re putting your energy toward separation rather than connection. And the love you’re seeking is all about connection.

Become the kind of person you want to date.

Polish up your own mirror, and you’ll start seeing sweet and clear reflections in your love life.

Believe it’s on its way.

You can’t manifest what you want. You can only manifest what you already acknowledge you have access to. One mantra to try on here:

I trust 100% that the perfect love is already on its way to me and will arrive in the perfect way at the perfect time. I’m ready to receive it with open arms now.

Read David Richo’s book How To Be an Adult in Relationships.

A powerhouse resource on mindful relationships and clearing the channels for genuine love.

Drop expectations of exactly when or how your love will come.

I know, you want that amazing love now. But the more pressure you put on the love you want, the less space that energy has to flow around it.  Believe it’s possible, take committed action within your control, and then back off and trust the process.

Stop forcing it.

Force blocks the flow of abundance and love. Relax and allow what’s meant to come to come.

Because if you truly believe it can, it will.

Cheers to your love life, inside and out.