With the arrival of the New Year, most of us are looking ahead to personal goals. For those of you who crave the status of “confident,” this list’s a keeper.

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No one is confident all the time, but some people seem to exude a healthy level of self-assurance. That confident look can leave others wondering “what’s the secret?”

Here are some of my observations about the habits of highly confident people.

1. They have a strong sense of self. They know what they like and what they don’t like. They’ve most likely built a strong sense of self by having a wide variety of experiences.

2. They have a strong sense of personal boundaries. They don’t try to please others merely for the sake of making others happy. But, that doesn’t mean they are contrarian to boost their ego either.

3. They learn from their past without dwelling on it. The past can play a role in helping us move forward in life, but not if we get stuck in it.

4. They go after their goals and dreams. They may feel fear, but they strive to reach their dreams anyway.

5. They recognize “mistakes“ are learning opportunities. They don’t beat themselves up for their mistakes, realizing that every mistake is an opportunity to learn likes, dislikes, and ways to be more successful next time.

6. They try new things. There is an expression that experience is the best teacher. Trying new things allows us to evolve as people.

7. They take risks. They make informed choices even if there is risk involved. They know the difference between a gamble and a risk. They prepare as much as they can and then dive in for those risks they feel are worth the effort.

8. They refuse to be victimized. One thing I learned from being a health practitioner is everyone has had difficulties and challenges. The highly confident person refuses to let the difficulties make them feel victimized. Of course, we all feel sorry for ourselves sometimes, but it is important not to linger in self-pity.

9. They celebrate their successes and the successes of others. You won’t find truly confident people who are jealous and diminishing of other people’s successes. They celebrate them.

10. They can be alone with their own thoughts without needing to fill every minute with conversation, technologies (cellphones, e-mail, texting, etc.), pastimes, or television.

11. They trust their instincts. Instincts help guide us on our path to make the best choices for us. Trusting these instincts helps us make better choices.

12. They accept change. Someone once said that “change is the only constant.” While highly confident people may not always like the changes occurring, they accept them and do their best to ride the wave of change.

13. They take care of themselves. They know that the expression GIGO (Garbage in, Garbage out) is true of the body.  They treat their body with respect by giving it high quality nourishment in the form of healthy food, fresh air, relaxation, and activity.

14. They boost others, not demean them. Confidence and ego-tripping aren’t the same things. Confident people don’t feel the need to put others down to build themselves up.

15. They don‘t beat themselves up. Of course, no one is perfect. Even the most confident of people have weak moments. They dust themselves off and keep going.

 

Written by Michelle Schoffro Cook

This article was originally published at Care2.

[image: via Tetsumo on flickr]