Everyone dates differently. But, can we engage in dating multiple people at once while remaining present enough and honest enough to them and ourselves?
Are you looking to get back in the dating game? Are you ready to explore and find someone who complements your beliefs, lifestyle, qualities and values?
As you’re probably aware, society changes—fast.
Men and women are more sexually-liberated where both sexes can play “meet and greet” with several people until they find the right person. In this world of dating, with a plethora of ways to meet your groom and/or bride, how many people should you date at once? It all depends on your goals, where you’re at in your life today and what you’re trying to accomplish.
Advantages & Disadvantages of Dating One Person
Traditional dating protocol insists we stick to one person at a time. As most relationships are monogamous in nature, it is expected of us to get to know one person first before moving onto someone else.
Advantages
- You will have a deeper understanding of who they are, what makes them tick, why they behave the way they do.
- Potential to form a strong emotional and physical bond with another individual.
- Someone who wants to spend their future with you, and ideally is willing to work to build the relationship into something great.
- A good foundation to build a family upon.
Disadvantages
- It is an act of betrayal to sleep with other people; unless, you both agree and have given consent to this.
- The quantity and quality of sex you have may decline over time (again, speak with your partner!)
- Monogamy has a huge financial and emotional investment.
- Sacrifices will be made, as compromise is key to healthy, lasting relationships.
Key Takeaways
Dating one person is most beneficial if you’re going for the long-haul. You need to be dedicated to maintaining and improving your relationship. Learning how to communicate effectively with each other will reduce the damage of inevitable arguments and fall outs.
However, finding the right person who will help you achieve this can be as difficult as finding a needle in a haystack. Meeting new people, spending time to get to know them and deciding whether they’re right for you is an arduous process. Especially if it all results in duds.
You’re busy. You probably have goals to achieve, friends and family to spend time with, and things to do. Or maybe you don’t—it doesn’t matter. However, you certainly don’t have the patience for time wasters. It’s time to cut the wheat from the chaff, and the best way to do this is to get to know multiple people.
Advantages & Disadvantages of Dating Multiple People
Whether you want to be in a polygamous or monogamous relationship, spending time with multiple people is a good way to understand what you want in a relationship. The more people you meet, the easier it will be to identify traits you don’t find attractive.
However, it all depends on your goals. Are you dating multiple people to experiment, to increase your chances of finding someone you want to be in a long term relationship with; or to have a polyamorous engagement?
Advantages
- You may have a more varied sex life, which for some people may make them happier and more confident in themselves.
- Less likely to have big arguments and fall outs—unless you have a personality clash, in which you’ll be doing yourself a favor not to pursue any further.
- Less emotional and financial investment required—unless you’re going out on dates every week.
- Commitment-light, there aren’t really any “rules” to abide by, apart from being safe.
Disadvantages
- Feelings may (will) start to develop. Leading to the breakdown of any existing arrangements, as jealousy can arise and people may get hurt.
- You may feel disconnected from each person you’re dating by only using them as an outlet for physical release.
- Having to hide them from one another. If you’re not in a polyamorous engagement, hiding your partners, or having two phones for contact, will lead to a messy breakup.
Key Takeaways
The amount of people you should date at once is primarily up to you. However, it’s best to make all parties aware of the engagement and it will reduce heartache and trouble. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship with one person, it is a good idea to get to know multiple people so you can eliminate those who seek to hurt you early on, whilst pursuing an individual who will treat you right.
[image: via shutterstock]