Would you end a 40 year friendship if a lover asked? Is this a huge red flag? Allana Pratt answers that and more in her latest video for MeetMindful!
Question:
If I have been friends with someone of the opposite sex for 40 years and began dating someone who is not comfortable with that friendship, does that person have a right to say something? Should I end the friendship, or should it be a non-issue?
Answer:
OMG I would never end a 40 yr friendship because your new partner is not comfortable with it. However, let’s dig deeper my friend, yes? Of course everybody has the right to say anything, we can be in total allowance and not react or justify, just listen.
Perhaps you are so close with your friend that your new partner feels jealous… that’s understandable. Perhaps you rely more on your friend than your new lover and it’s time to risk opening up and being vulnerable with them, not turning to your friend. Is that possibly whats happening?
It’s also possible that your friend of the opposite sex has been your partner for everything except sex… and it’s time to shift more connection toward your lover and less with your friend.
There is a healthy balance where everyone ought to feel seen, valued, and connected. It doesn’t have to be either/or… so I would talk to your lover about why they feel this way and really take it to heart. It’s possible they are control freaks and overly jealous… yet, I doubt you would attract someone like this, yes? So perhaps there’s growth for EVERYONE here to explore… but please don’t let go of a 40 yr friendship just because someone is uncomfortable.
Sit in the fire and ask: What else is possible so that we’re all happy?
And of course, this is an emotional subject and sometimes a third party like a coach/healer like myself is exactly what’s required so that the highest good comes with ease and grace and success for all, the cost of it not going well could be that you lose them both! So I invite you to apply for a complementary strategy session with me at www.AllanaPratt.com/connect. Say MeetMindful sent you and let’s see if I can help smooth the way for everyone being heard, honored, and getting what they desire and require to thrive.
Huge love, Allana oxox