So you had this AMAZING date, you parted ways, you texted, and then… nothing. Wondering to yourself, “should I keep texting”? This one’s just for you!
So you go on an amazing first date with someone you really like. You seem to hit it off. Maybe you didn’t have that much to talk about or maybe a few things were awkward, but in general, you truly did feel a good connection and could tell there was some kind of spark between you two.
Except, then, something weird and confusing happens…
After the date, you part ways with a big smile on your face and giddily look at your phone in anticipation of the flirty texting you’re about to do.
You know what I’m talking about. That fresh text message exchange after you “click” with someone new.
But then, instead of engaging in an adorable and romantic and flirtatious texting exchange, what do you get?
You get nothing. You get silence.
They flat out don’t text you at all.
You might even think to yourself, “should I text them first or wait for them to text me?”
You might even try to figure out if they’re intentionally ignoring you to make sure they keep you interested and don’t appear needy.
But then as days go by… Still nothing. Radio silence.
Disappointment consumes you and leaves you deflated, trying to figure out what went wrong. Trying to figure out why they didn’t text you back.
Well, I’m going to give you the most common reasons why someone doesn’t text back after what seems like a great first date.
And if you’re interested in a more general situation, check out my best article about the general reasons why people suddenly stop texting back—and what to do about it.
The 3 Most Common Reasons Someone Stops Texting Back After A First Date
Reason #1: They Weren’t That Interested
I hate to say this, but it may be the truth. Sometimes while you think someone seemed interested, in reality, they might not have been as into you as you thought. See, just because you felt a certain way doesn’t necessarily mean they did as well. It’s not that you’re a bad person or that you’re not someone who is enjoyable to be around. Not at all. All this means is their level of interest might not be where you think it is.
If this is the case, your best bet is to truly stop worrying and fixating on it. You can send them one text if you want and just leave it at that. But if you do send them a text, do it with this mindset: that you are truly, 100% okay if they don’t respond.
This will not only save you a lot of misery and frustration but will also make the other person more likely to respond. When you come from this place of genuinely being OK with whether they do or don’t respond, you increase the likelihood that they actually will respond. And if they don’t? Then at least you know they’re not interested and you can move on to leave space for someone who is interested to come into your life.
This article explains a lot about what people do and don’t respond to in a text message.
Reason #2: They Realized You Have a Lot of Expectations
This reason is relevant if you said things implying that you see a future with them and that you really want things to move forward fast.
If you sent them a text after the date and then continued to send more texts without a response, this might have put them off. You might have given the impression that you expect a lot out of them and soon.
In this case, your only option is really to back off and to focus on having fun in your life. If they respond to you, great. If they don’t, don’t take it personally. Simply move on to find someone who naturally likes you for you.
This article has a lot more reasons why someone might have stopped texting you with some advice about what to do about it.
Reason #3: They’re Busy
This is an extremely common reason that a lot of people tend to overlook. They might actually be super interested in you but simply don’t have the time to send a text. They might literally be busy doing something in their life and will get back to you when they have a chance to. So rather than worrying, relax. If you send them tons of messages in the meantime and they’re busy, the truth is… This will make them unlikely to respond. Even if they would have responded before, doing this will sabotage your shot of getting them to respond to you.
At the end of the day, you could speculate for hours and drive yourself utterly insane thinking up a million reasons to answer the question of why they didn’t text back. The truth is… You can never really know for certain. And you cannot control the actions and emotions of other people. And why would you want to anyway?
Let things unfold as they may. Don’t text needing a response. This will make it a lot easier to actually enjoy dating and texting rather than make it into yet another source of stress in your life.
About the Author
Vixendaily.com is the only site out there that specializes in mind-reading quizzes, content and advice tailored to your particular needs. It’s like having your own personal mentor guiding you through life’s challenges every step of the way!
It was founded by dating and relationship expert, Nick Bastion, who is the main contributor to the Love & Relationship Advice section of the site.