in: Wellness

The Danger of Validation: Unplugging From the Social Matrix

There is an inherent drive to want acceptance and validation—in what we do and in who we are; but this inner-drive, when combined with the lure of technology, can be the root of an unhealthy fixation.

Think about how many times you look at your phone every day. You can under-exaggerate it all you want, but your eyes are fixed on either your smart phone or computer screen right now. When you can’t look at it in the name of social etiquette, you’re thinking about checking it—your text messages, your email, your Facebook account.

We claim to be so-frequently glued to these technologies because we are all such prosperous businesspeople and diligent artists that we can’t bear to miss one opportunity or transaction.

The truth is that we need to be validated. We need to know that the rest of our society views us as a worthy member.

Everyone needs to matter. We need to exist for a reason. Every legitimate email, text message or social media hit lets us know that we are important in some way.

This practice, though widely accepted today, is not a healthy one. We become so consumed with this desire to be noticed that most of our actions are focused toward it and we lose sight of what we really need and who we truly are.

Our perception of ourselves becomes clouded and dependent upon other people who are caught in the same social matrix. Even worse, this addiction can manifest itself in ways that affect others. In order to feel validated, even good men tend to objectify women in ways that garner attention.

It seems childlike and counterintuitive, but we do it anyway.

The Authentic Man Program offers a cure to this epidemic. It is called the “No Woman Diet,” and it entails removing yourself from all things that draw you toward unhealthy behavioral patterns for six weeks.

In addition to unplugging the cable linking your brain to the technology providing these false validations, the diet includes abstaining from dating, “checking out” and fantasizing about women for that period of time.

The hope is that you will allow yourself to be in touch with your true needs and your genuine sense of self-importance on your way to becoming a more secure, and therefore more attractive, man.

To learn more about the diet or sign up for the live tele-conference, click here.

[image: via aaronisnotcool on flickr]


About the Author:


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