in: Dating & Relationships

The Man in the Crisp White Shirt: On Loving without Judgement

Guest Contributor

While we all create filters to rule out the not-for-us partners, there’s something to be said for loving without judgement. It’s time to release the labels.

—This article was originally published by our friends at elephant journal; we’re republishing (with permission!) because we love it… and them. Enjoy.— 

“As long as we continue to live as if we are what we do, what we have, and what other people think about us, we will remain filled with judgments, opinions, evaluations, and condemnations. We will remain addicted to putting people and things in their ‘right’ place.” 

~ Henri J.M. Nouwen

I never thought the man in the crisp white shirt would intrigue me.

I actually remember telling my family they should be prepared for me to end up with a weird looking, totally spiritual, super adventurous, hippy kind of vegan guy.

I was certain that the man in the crisp white shirt had simply given into society’s expectations, screwed people around, or well… was exceptionally boring.

I was mistaken.

I am hopefully in love with the man in a crisp white shirt—an exceptional man in a crisp white shirt.

We differ distinctly.

This sometimes leads to dinner parties with my younger, wild, hipster and hippy crowd, where the man in the crisp white shirt stands out like a sore thumb. I have, on many an occasion, felt and seen the stares and judgement toward that man. Perhaps they are thinking what I thought a few years ago: this man is just following the man.


Follow us to elephant journal to continue reading “The Man in the Crisp White Shirt: On Loving without Judgement” and have a happy day.

About the Author

Gente Coetzee is a 20 year old girl who’s madly in love with a 31 year old, frightened and anxious, empathic, unconditional lover. She is an au pair for two beautiful girls. She hasn’t studied because nothing speaks to her heart. As a matter of fact, she don’t really want a real job. She has no desire to work for a big company. She wants to write stories and poems. Gente wants to to be a lover and maybe a mother. Until then, she wants time for herself, to daydream, and relax without guilt.

About the Author:

Guest Contributor Guest Contributor

MeetMindful is the first online dating site to serve the mindful lifestyle. As part of that service, we’re bringing you a library of content from some of the most knowledgeable contributors in the areas of love and mindful living. If you have a story to tell or a lesson to share and you’d like to contribute to our site as a guest, please email us at [email protected] If we’re a great match, we’d love to tell you more about joining our family of writers.



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